What I Know

Song I wrote to: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e3hjpNuvapQ

Dear Kellsie,

I think there's a lot of negative stigma concerning mental illness that really needs to fuck off. People need to understand that it's an invisible illness. But just because it's invisible doesn't make it any less real than any other disease on earth. I've compiled a list of things that are myths, and have taken it upon myself to go ahead and clear them up for all of y'all who are too dumb to think for yourselves, so you just believe whatever bullshit the media and crappy TV shows tell you.

1.) Depression is just a "down" feeling. No. Just no. Depression is a chemical imbalance in the brain. Just like how people get cancer when their bodies produce cells too quickly, depression occurs when the brain doesn't make enough "happy" chemicals quickly enough. Dopamine, oxytocin, seratonin, and endorphins are a few of these. They're very, very real and backed by science. Look it up.

2.) When someone who is sick pushes you away, it's because you did something wrong. This is another big "no." As I stated before, depression is a lack of happy chemicals in the brain. Just because you are near someone when they have an episode doesn't mean you messed up. That's not to say you did; I have no idea what's going on in your life. But odds are, if someone has an episode, it has everything to do with what's happening in their head and nothing to do with you. Don't take it personally, you're not that special.

3.) Sick people are seeking attention and need to get over it, also known as the most insensitive thing you can say to someone who is struggling with a mental illness. Some people, like myself, struggled with mental illnesses for years before feeling like they could reach out for help. Reaching out for help is a good thing that should not be shamed. Would you tell someone with an infection not to go to the doctor for antibiotics because you didn't think they needed them? I sure as hell hope not. If you would, you're a terrible person and wouldn't be saying that if you were the sick one. Sometimes, if people cut in a visible place it's because they are looking for help. Not because they care what you and your over-sized ego think, but because they don't know how else to ask. Maybe they have no one to go to. Maybe they don't feel safe. Maybe the cuts feel better than the pain they feel on the inside. I don't know, and you sure as hell don't either, so don't judge. Ever. Don't do it. Only they know how they feel and even then they don't understand it completely. Offer to get them help, and then leave it up to them and tell a trusted adult. Don't put your nose in their business any more than that. This shit is hard enough as it is without people thinking it's okay to have an opinion on something they know nothing about.

4.) People with eating disorders just need to eat. Honey, if it were that simple, don't you think everyone would be perfectly healthy all the time? It's not that easy. Everyone who has struggled with an eating disorder wishes it were, but it just isn't. This specific mental illness is something I still can't put into words. My personal eating disorder is like a gnat that's been flying around for years and I just can't squash. Sometimes, I almost forget it's there. Almost; until I don't. Relationships with food is hard for anyone, but add a mental illness in and it's a hot mess. Food is more than just "fuel for the body" to someone with an eating disorder. It's so real it almost feels tangible. It's more than a feeling or "diet." It's a voice in your head constantly bringing you down and telling you you don't deserve to eat for a variety of reasons. Don't tell someone they're too thin, just like your mother (hopefully) told you not to tell people they're too fat. Don't tell them to "just eat" because there's no such thing as "just eating" when you're sick.

This list contains four main points I think are issues. Four points out of I don't even know how many if I had the time to think about it. Of course, this is my own personal opinion from my own personal experiences. It doesn't apply to every sick person and isn't specific to everyone's lives. But one thing I feel very strongly about is being kind to everyone. You don't know what they've been through. Even if you've been through a similar illness or even the same one, everyone takes things and sees things differently, so don't tell them you know what they're going through because you don't. Most people can't even fathom what it's like to be sick and I am genuinely happy about that. I hope you don't understand it. I hope you never do. Because this illness, these illnesses, are something I wouldn't even wish on my worst enemy.

Sincerely,
Alice.